I have a date tomorrow.
With this guy I barely know.
Dunno why I’m doing it, really. I think I’m trying to prove to myself that I can still manage normal.
I don’t really feel like dating or having a relationship at all. But I currently have no single friends and it’s really hard to hang out with them and only hear “couple talk”. I hate it.
I know this date tomorrow is cowardly and self-destructive and stupid and meaningless. And completely unfair to the guy. And I can’t find it in myself to care.
I think I’m in a story where I’m the villain.
I’m not really sure who the hero’s supposed to be.
Maybe they’ll win eventually and I won’t have to deal with all this anymore.
I think I’d like that.