I took 4 Primatene tablets today. 

I know that was dumb.

I know that.

I’m a little on edge now because of it.  Ok.  More than a little.  That much ephedrine going through my system is not a good thing.  I know.  I know I know I know.

Army’s pissed at me.  I dunno why I told him.  I should have just lied.  I did lie slightly, saying I was “distracted” and “didn’t realize” I hadn’t already taken a dose. 

Total lie.

I intended to take 4 from the beginning.

I’m not exactly sure why.  Except that work is stressing me. 

We have two people out of town this week and files piling up on my desk and my supervisor breathing down my neck and the program demanding moremoremore and a customer service webinar that’s required I attend but I can’t fit it into my schedule without taking a productivity hit but my supervisor wants higher and higher productivity and-

I just can’t do it all.

I thought maybe 4 would make me more of a superhero.

But I just feel nervous, my heart racing, and the air around me seems to be vibrating.

Is that normal?

It’s fine.  I can get through these files. I don’t settle.  I’ve never settled.  I am perfection at my job.  I always manage what is requested of me.


I can be Wonder Woman.


8 thoughts on “4

    1. Pen Post author

      Thank you. I think I’m feeling better. Just a bit jittery now. Gonna go home and watch dumb movies and not think.

  1. kat

    You are already Wonder Woman. Next time try Nodoz. But I am sure even without any extra energy you will still get it done–cause you are awesome just as you are.

    1. Pen Post author

      Is Nodoz the caffeine pills? Do they have anything else in them?
      I tend to guzzle caffeine in general anyway. Not sure if pills would make a huge difference. Maybe psychologically. I sometimes think my issue is that I just need the action of swallowing a pill to calm me down.
      I am a messed up person, obviously.

      You’re sweet though. I thank you. ❤


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