The Answer

I had a dream last night.

I dreamed a solution for all my health trouble and medical maladies.

I dreamed that in all my previous lives/incarnations, my body perished before the age of 25.  Not necessarily in a nasty way (though some were).  Then it was explained to me that my soul is not able to stay in a body past 25.

That the body will begin to break down.  To self-destruct.  And it was explained in the dream so logically, so simply.

It made complete sense.

It makes complete sense.

I’m supposed to die.

Not in a suicidal way, but in a way that my soul will simply burn this body up before too long.

I am not sure why my soul isn’t able to keep a body alive longer.  I only know that it can’t.

My psyche is fragmented.  There are parts of me screaming out that this belief is complete irrational.  That I am slipping into a schizophrenic type delusion.

Those voices are silly.

Don’t they see this explanation makes complete sense?  That it explains everything?  Of course my body does not respond to meds and has unexplained symptoms that are trying desperately to give me a stroke/heart attack or other malady.

I don’t really feel sad.  I feel so very relieved.  I thank this dream for giving me the answer.  I can relax.  I can stop fighting, stop struggling, and just rest.

I look forward to not being in pain anymore.

I know there are people who will be sad.  But it’s meant to be.  It’s how I am made.  How my soul exists.  It cannot be unmade or changed.

Cogs in a clock, things must move as they are meant to.

Peace sounds so very nice.

4 thoughts on “The Answer

  1. Mental Mama

    Yup, peace does sound nice. Peace of your mind and body at the same time – while still breathing happily – sounds even better. Just because the docs haven’t found the right answer yet doesn’t mean they’re not going to. You’re just a very mysterious woman.

    Reply

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