Needs

Things I need today:

1.) The case and/or trial for the asshats, who invaded the family of my best friend’s home and tied them up at gunpoint, to go at quickly and with as little hassle for those I care about. They’ve already been through enough.

2.) My uterus to stop trying to murder itself or whatever the hell it’s doing in there. Whatever it is, it’s way too painful to suffer through at work. Ready for a heating pad and bed.

3.) To find a new job. Being laid off at the end of the year sucks. Even if it’s for the “best reason possible” (my government contract is ending and my company couldn’t find a replacement) so I got many recommendation letters and references/referrals. But I really don’t want to go through unemployment.

4.) Thanksgiving to go swiftly. There is too much family coming into town and having to try and manage two separate Thanksgiving dinners within a 3 hour period is already intimidating me. I just want it to be Friday right now.

5.) My boxes to finish unpacking themselves. I swear to god at my new house the unpacking never ends. I came from a freakin’ one bedroom apartment. Where did all this stuff come from???

6.) My physical-health to remain at a low, manageable level during my (hopefully brief) period of no insurance. I can’t deal with a hefty medical bill at the moment.

7.) My mental-health to continue to cope as best it can with the severe lack of friendship lately. I’m going to keep assuming it’s holidays, or school, or work, or other matters that caused my “pool” of friends and support to suddenly dry up, even if that darker part of me assumes it’s me (of course it’s you- you’re a terrible friend). But I can push through this. With the help of the pills and the powder, I can deal with it myself.

Gentle thoughts to all of you.

Disclaimer: #7 is referring to friends I deal with in person. I know many of my followers on here (and one I talk to via email/messaging) are very supportive. And I appreciate that. It’s just hard when I don’t have someone to literally sit next to me and make me focus on something besides my own head.